The Meaning of Bollocks
- something rubbish
- a falsehood or series of lies
- a Wagstaff scorecard
- something great
- the best possible
- testicles
- exclamation on making a error
- toe inflammation from cheap wine
- the Horks greatest ever player
- the winner of JWMGC XIX
Myke Bollok became the third Horks player in the past four years to win the Johnny Woodpecker Memorial trophy, confirming his place amongst legends.
The Horks continued their rise from hillbilly Slytherins to trophy winners and Pollock did it the hard way. Not selected by his local franchise The Magpies (along with Frazr Poland) he was sent to lead the misfits and miscreants, and he did so with such aplomb that they are now one of the greatest teams in Woodpecker history.
Pos | Player | HC | Team | RND 1 | ST | RND 2 | ST | +/- | F |
1 | Myke Bollok | 23 | Horks | 98 | 38 | 91 | 40 | -1 | 78 |
2 | Yawn Morsely | 17 | Swans | 88 | 41 | 89 | 36 | -1 | 77 |
2 | Don Sure | 29 | Falcons | 102 | 40 | 100 | 37 | +0 | 77 |
4 | Danny Smurfette | 30 | Swans | 106 | 40 | 108 | 31 | +10 | 71 |
4 | Juan Stoked | 33 | Falcons | 107 | 39 | 109 | 32 | +6 | 71 |
4 | Darren Stalone | 33 | Magpies | 114 | 31 | 101 | 40 | +5 | 71 |
7 | Larry Bonding | 23 | Horks | 105 | 33 | 101 | 34 | +16 | 67 |
7 | Mark Gemstone | 22 | Magpies | 103 | 32 | 95 | 35 | +10 | 67 |
9 | Simon Chur | 25 | Magpies | 107 | 31 | 99 | 34 | +12 | 65 |
9 | Peta Hunt | 9 | Falcons | 93 | 30 | 82 | 35 | +13 | 65 |
11 | Steve McSofty | 33 | Horks | 115 | 32 | 111 | 30 | +16 | 62 |
11 | Mr Burguezz | 32 | Magpies | 114 | 30 | 108 | 32 | +14 | 62 |
11 | Nude Vaginor | 36 | Magpies | 119 | 29 | 112 | 33 | +15 | 62 |
14 | Dr Zooce | 25 | Falcons | 104 | 35 | 107 | 26 | +17 | 61 |
14 | Spruce Lawn | 36 | Horks | 115 | 33 | 118 | 28 | +17 | 61 |
16 | Mark Lawless | 9 | Horks | 86 | 35 | 92 | 25 | +16 | 60 |
17 | Johnny Wavish | 31 | Swans | 108 | 35 | 116 | 24 | +18 | 59 |
17 | Dean Brownarse | 26 | Swans | 110 | 29 | 105 | 30 | +19 | 59 |
17 | Simon Schteemin | 23 | Swans | 112 | 27 | 99 | 32 | +21 | 59 |
20 | Dave Wayward | 24 | Falcons | 116 | 22 | 97 | 35 | +21 | 57 |
21 | Malachy Mivnan | 29 | Magpies | 110 | 31 | 114 | 25 | +22 | 56 |
21 | Mick Nillichip | 34 | Swans | 122 | 24 | 110 | 32 | +20 | 56 |
21 | Matt Whiteman | 26 | Falcons | 120 | 24 | 104 | 32 | +28 | 56 |
24 | Drewe Meetz | 27 | Falcons | 115 | 25 | 106 | 30 | +23 | 55 |
25 | Fabio Rossini | 19 | Falcons | 101 | 30 | 105 | 24 | +24 | 54 |
25 | Mike Smyth | 22 | Horks | 107 | 29 | 105 | 25 | +24 | 54 |
27 | Mick Fight | 25 | Swans | 112 | 27 | 109 | 25 | +27 | 52 |
28 | Frazr Poland | 27 | Horks | 119 | 22 | 108 | 29 | +29 | 51 |
28 | Craig Sudoku | 19 | Magpies | 114 | 21 | 97 | 30 | +29 | 51 |
30 | Deane Sure | 25 | Swans | 123 | 17 | 116 | 19 | +45 | 36 |
31 | Alaine Hunks | 31 | Horks | 131 | 18 | 126 | 16 | +51 | 34 |
32 | Red Lowe | 22 | Magpies | 132 | 9 | 134 | 4 | +78 | 13 |
The Magpies | The Swans | The Falcons | The Horks | ||||
Darren Stalone (C) | Yawn Morsely (C) | Juan Stoked (C) | Alaine Hunks (C) | ||||
Simon Chur | Deane Sure | Peta Hunt | Larry Bonding | ||||
Craig Sudoku | Dean Brownarse | Fabio Rossini | Frazr Poland | ||||
Malachy Sickman | Simon Schteemin | Dave Wayward | Spruce Lawn | ||||
Mr Burguezz | Mick Fight | Dr Zooce | Steve McSofty | ||||
Mark Gemstone | Dan Murfitt | Don Sure | Myke Bollok | ||||
Nude Vaginor | Mick Nillichip | Drewe Meetz | Mark Laws | ||||
Red Lowe | Jon Jon Waveless | Matt Whiteman | Mike Smyth |