AWHC Release Handicaps Amid Protest


The self appointed Auckland Woodpecker Handicapping Committee (AWHC)today officially released the handicaps for the 2004 Johnny Woodpecker Memorial Golf Classic today amid wild protests from avid fans of the players. It was estimated that approximately 5,000 fans protested at what they felt were some harsh handicapping from the AWHC who have been criticised for being “in fear of the Burg”.

New AWHC spokesman Fraser (Krusty) Moors released this statement through his Head Of Communcations:


“There will inevitably be some ructions from the province … generally attributed to one or two devils with a potato on their shoulder about Aucklanders running the show. They needn’t get too hung up worrying about people in Auckland as the good folk in the city of sails don’t worry about anyone from the provinces. In a modern democracy it is all about numbers and on that basis all of Auckland Handicap Committee’s decisions will be binding.”