Boycott Looms Large

A dark cloud is beginning to hang over the Johnny Woodpecker 2004 with growing discontent from many of the pickled veterans as to the new handicapping system recently proposed by the newly formed AWHC(Auckland Woodpecker Handicapping Committee).

The proposal to cap the handicaps at a maximum of 30 was rumoured to have been proposed by Raymond Tidy veteran Don Sure who has subsequently left the country for fear of his own safety. AWHC spokesman Fabio Rossini released a brief statement today regarding the possible boycott from many of the senior players: – “Did you know that Almonds are grafted on to the stem of a peach tree as they are less prone to rot and the tree is likely to live longer?