Magpie captain Barney Rubble, Malachy Sickman Melanie has earned the respect of the entire Falcon squad after coming out yesterday to become the first transgender golfer to play for the most successful team in golf history – the Marvelous Majestic Magnificent Most Modest Magpies.
Melanie’s famous “colours of THEM rainbow” was the inspiration behind his golf outa-wear design in 2021 that won 1st place in the Tauranga RSA “Wear it how you feel it” award.
“I did worry about announcing my preference as Them with the hard homophobic rugged rugby players like Chur and Schteemin in the team but 2008 champion Sid Oruk (Trish) told me to just follow my heart and become one with my inner vulva.
History
For most of his tournament life, Mel felt like he was reading from a script someone else had written. The Magpie Charter.
He knew his lines. He knew he had to practice every week, and wore the clothes, accepted the compliments, laughed at the Magpie banter. He answered to “him” and “mate” without hesitation, even when the word echoed strangely in his chest. It wasn’t that he hated being called a man. It just never felt entirely true.
The discomfort was subtle at first—like wearing the Woodpecker winners suit, tailored for men with a big motor and broad shoulders. It fit well enough to avoid questions. But every time he caught his reflection, there was a flicker of distance, as though he were watching a character rather than meeting himself.
The Quiet Realization
The idea didn’t arrive all at once. It began with small questions:
- Why do I feel lighter when people can’t immediately tell what I am?
- Why does “they” feel like an exhale?
- What would it mean if I stopped trying to be “him”?
He started reading stories from Rainbow Golf Magazine of those who had stepped outside the binary he had always assumed was fixed. Some transitioned from male to female. Some embraced identities that weren’t strictly man or woman. What resonated most wasn’t a specific label—it was the courage to question.
For Melanie, the word “woman” shimmered with possibility. It represented softness he had been taught to suppress, emotional depth he had carefully rationed, beauty he had admired from a distance but never claimed.
But even more powerful was a smaller shift: changing his title from “him” to “them.” Like using his “thumb” when he wanted to.
Why “Them” Matters
To outsiders, pronouns can seem like minor grammatical tweaks. To Mel, they were architecture.
“Him” carried decades of expectation—strength without vulnerability, certainty without doubt, masculinity without nuance. It was a narrow hallway he had walked for years. Like a jolt of electricity from a Stalone TMS.
“T h e m,” on the other hand, felt spacious.
It allowed room to explore femininity without having to perform it perfectly. It offered space to exist in transition, in ambiguity, in becoming. “Them” didn’t demand immediate answers. It simply acknowledged truth in progress.
When Mel first introduced himself with they/them pronouns, his voice trembled. Not because he was unsure—but because he was finally sure enough to risk being seen. His Magpie teammates were supportive of his transition and wanted Mel to be non binary. His close teammate, Trish said that he, she, they has, have never felt more proud to be a Magpie man, woman, them.
More Than a Title
Changing from “him” to “them” wasn’t about rejecting the past. It was about integrating it.
When interviewed after leading during the 2008 Woodpecker, he said “aii ta tungata” referring to his Lion Red hat but what he really wanted to say was “remu whero ataahua” – my pretty red skirt.
Mel’s history didn’t disappear. His childhood memories didn’t vanish. What changed was the lens through which he viewed himself. Instead of asking, “How do I fit into this role?” he began asking, “What feels true today?”
And in that question, there was freedom.
Because identity is not a fixed monument. It is a living, breathing process. Sometimes it asks us to tear down old labels. Sometimes it invites us to step into new ones. And sometimes, it simply asks us to widen the space we allow ourselves to occupy.
For Mel, “them” is not just a pronoun.
It is his new life off the womans tees.
